I’m making it my intention to use the words alienated and shunned rather than isolated, the former clearly describes my reality.
My ex friend would contact me every 6 months via text to demand emotional labor. She lived 30 minutes away and we didn’t see each other offline unless I initiated and organized the whole gathering while I observed that she initiated and organized to hangout with her other friends without inviting me.
She said once: I don’t understand why you’re so isolated. You keep saying you’re isolated but I keep seeing you online posting things about self-care and mindfulness. You look so good! You’re so different, I can’t even explain but your not like the other ladies I hang with. Is all the self-care you are doing helping with your isolation?
Since she lacked self awareness of her own actions and my repeated explanation of how I define community fell on a human that didn’t have the capacity to give, I ended that connection.